All Suffering Is Self-Created

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We all know what suffering is. It can span the spectrum from mild anxiety and stress to extreme terror or grave depression. It is true that all human beings experience setbacks, disappointments and tragedies in life. No one is exempt from tasting all the flavors of this world.

Yet there are some people who are resiliant and overcome their hardships whereas others seem to be stuck in their misery and victimhood. Some people are able to attract good jobs, beautiful homes, kind friends, and maintain a healthy body where others accrue more debt, keep getting in trouble with the law, remain stuck in a rut, or live with chronic illness. There must be a reason why some people are able to transcend their suffering while others perpetuate it. What is the cause of all this?

It is widely known in Western psychology as well as in Eastern spirituality that the suffering we experience is because we believe our thoughts. It is our thought and belief of a person or situation that causes our pain and suffering; not the actual experience or person. This may sound like a radical notion but it is the foundation towards self-realization and personal empowerment.

Generally, mental and emotional healing come through greater self-awareness and understanding. In Western psychology the aim is to generate increased levels of self-awareness while learning coping mechanisms in order to reframe our past and current life circumstances. In coaching we uncover hidden limitations to an individual’s state of awareness and set actionable goals towards living a more fulfilling and satisfying life. In spiritual self realization we take responsibility for everything that has ever happened to us and use it as a catalyst towards discovering our true nature.  

Breaking The Unconscious Programming Of The Past

Many people grew up in chaotic, distressful and negative family environments and have lots of emotional wounds from their early life experiences. These life situations have left their mark on people and color their world in the way they percieve life. In many ways these individual’s unconsciously attract the same negative people, places, and things that they were once subjected to simply because they are unaware. These people are innocently unconscious and ignorant to their own programming and lack the self-awareness and clarity to seek an alternate way of living consciously in the world. Whether it is through counseling, therapy, coaching, or spiritual practice, there are proven ways in which an individual can break free from these repetitive karmic cycles.

In both Western psychology and Eastern spirituality, we can easily see how our external lives serve as a mirror to what is happening in our inner world. Thus, if one wants to know the inner nature of their mind all they need do is take an honest look at the life they are currently living. The players and characters in your world are mirrors of you. The circumstances we find ourselves in show us our current level of consciousness. The environment we live in illustrates our thoughts and emotions.

We alone determine how much or how little we get by what we feel we deserve. We are truly the creators of our own subjective reality and thus all of our happiness or suffering is completely self-created.     

This turning point in life is often the beginning of personal growth and possibly the spiritual path; one in which a human being no longer seeks external validation or approval from others but understands that lasting happiness and peace can only be found from within. There are no more victims and there are no more perpetrators. Only life circumstances by which we do our best with what we have. As we go within and acquire greater self-awareness and clarity of perception we see very clearly how the circumstances in our lives occur at the perfect time and place to offer help, assistance, guidance, lessons, alarms, and wake-up calls. If you are here reading this then perhaps you are ready to take responsibility for your thoughts and programming and consciously choose a more enhanced way of perceiviing and living life.

“All experiences facilitate the expansion of consciousness. There are no exceptions.” – Liz hancock

Learning To Accept The Present Moment As It Is

Life presents many situations for us to experience. Some of these are very challenging and extremely difficult. As we commit to greater self-awareness with Spiritual Life Coaching we know that accepting what is happening is the only way forward. We cannot change another person nor can we change what has happened to us and so we must let go of our expectations and allow the present moment to be what it is.

Are Your Unconscious Beliefs Holding You Back?

Listening to Your Inner Wisdom

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Inner Wisdom

If we all knew how to access the deep inner wisdom that we all have, then we wouldn’t have a need for doctors, therapists, or spiritual teachers.

This doesn’t mean that we have no need for outside assistance. We all had to learn our ABC’s and how to count. But when we are talking about body awareness, mental health, and spiritual growth, these all fall within the realm of inner knowing and intuition.

Our bodies are simply an extension of our mind. If you want to get an understanding of who someone is just take a look at the vehicle they are using. In most cases, the body reveals your past, your present, and can even predict your future if you pay close enough attention.

This reminds me of a quote that used to flash across the screen at my old gym, “What you eat in private is what we see in public.” 

Similarly to the body, we can also sense, feel, and know anything we wish through our sensitivity to energy. Our aura is the unseen extension of us. Though we may think we are hiding certain aspects of ourselves, everything is accessible through the quality of our energetic aura. 

This energy field cannot and does not lie. If one is sensitive enough you can simply feel the energy field around someone and know everything you need to know. Words are actually a very primitive mode of communication. They often confuse and complicate things. Energy on the other hand, is always crystal clear. 

I mention all the above because whatever assistance we need, in whatever capacity, whether it be diet, mental health, or spiritual awakening; it is always accessible from within. We don’t need to seek what is already within us, from the outside.

Yet, because we don’t know how to access this inner wisdom we turn to doctors, therapists or spiritual teachers. 

Connecting To Our Inner Wisdom

So, how do we strengthen the connection to our inner wisdom? What can we do? How do we do it?

Well, first you will need to be ok with being alone. Alone doesn’t translate to ‘lonely’. Alone simply means having no one else present. 

Being alone with your mind, body, emotions, and energy is extremely enlightening. In order to know what you need to work on and what direction and guidance you need, you first need to understand what you’re working with. 

When you are alone with yourself you pay attention to your physical body, thoughts, habits, and ways of reacting to things. We gain immense self-awareness through being alone as well as strengthen the connection to ourselves.

Being alone allows for deep reflection and contemplation. We can reflect on our behavior, our tendencies, the language we use and words we choose, the friends we keep, the relationships we form, the food we eat, the home we inhabit, the lifestyle we live. 

Without this alone time and greater self-awareness, we are lead to believe that we are the product of unforeseen circumstances. There are many that have settled into the notion that our upbringing, parents, genetics, or environment are to blame. 

However through being alone we can truly take the time to contemplate on how we arrived at exactly where we at in our lives. Through reflection and contemplation we can see that everything that has happened, occurred through moment-by-moment choices. Perhaps some more conscious than others. 

Right now, we are living the consequences of each of these moment-by-moment choices. 

The paradox to living joyfully is accepting responsibility of your life and this is precisely the reason why so many people are unhappy and depressed. They refuse to take responsibility for their body, mind, emotions, and energetic state.

Being alone allows for deep reflection and contemplation. We courageously face all facets of our selves and we slowly integrate them. We become more self-aware. We mature, grow, and expand our consciousness. 

Being alone and having the courage to self-reflect is all you need to strengthen your connection to your own innate inner wisdom. With consistent practice, your connection to your inner wisdom will be so strong that you will intuitively know what are the right foods for you to eat, what people are best to commune with, where to best focus your time, how to exercise the body, what skill to learn, what job to take, how best to execute a plan, and how to live your best life. 

There is no cookie-cutter answer to create joy or wisdom. As everyone is different there are millions of ways to go about creating joy for oneself. 

Do yourself a favor and spend some time alone today. 

Inner Wisdom and Solitude

Start small and get a journal.

Write down your impressions, thoughts, feelings, and fears. 

Keep up the practice everyday.

Learn to form a relationship with your Self. 

Learn to look forward to this alone time.

Learn to appreciate the inner gift of higher wisdom.

And when you are so filled with joy that you feel you could burst,…

Go ahead and start spreading and shining that joy unto others.

What If The Answers You Seek Are Already Within You?

What Do You See When You Look At This Homeless Man?

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What do you see here? A worthless bum or joyful free being? A disgusting vagrant or a version of your greater Self?

How you see the world tells a lot about you.

“A MAN IS WHAT HE THINKS ABOUT ALL DAY LONG.” – RALPH WALDO EMERSON 

There is a passage in the book, Power vs. Force by David R. Hawkins that has stayed with me for many years. For those that are unfamiliar, Hawkins was a prominent American Psychiatrist who was also an ardent spiritual seeker. Through many years of searching he finally realized the ultimate goal, that of awakening or enlightenment.

His scientific background paired with the awakened state prompted him to create a model for expressing various levels of consciousness. Like many emotional scales, his numerical model helps to illustrate increasing levels of maturity and growth in the development of individual human evolution beginning with shame, guilt and apathy and eventually reaching to the pinnacle of conscious evolution and the experience of joy, peace and enlightenment. Instead of paraphrasing this passage, I feel it is best to simply absorb it on your own:

“…Imagine a “bum” on the street corner: In an upscale neighborhood stands an old man in tattered clothes, alone and leaning against the corner of an elegant brownstone. Look at him from the perspective of various levels of consciousness, and note the differences in how he appears to different people and viewpoints.

  • From the bottom of the scale, at the level of 20 (Shame), the bum is seen to be dirty, disgusting, and disgraceful. From the level 30 (Guilt), he’d be blamed for his condition: He deserves what he gets; he’s probably a lazy welfare cheat. At 50 (Hopelessness), his plight would appear desperate, a damning piece of evidence to prove that society can’t do anything about homelessness. At 75 (Grief), the old man looks tragic, friendless, and forlorn.
  • At consciousness level of 100 (Fear), we might see the bum as threatening, a social menace: Perhaps we should call the police before he commits some crime. At 125 (Desire), he might represent a frustrating problem – why doesn’t somebody do something? At 150 (Anger), the old man might look like he could be violent; or, on the other hand, one could be furious that such horrible conditions exist in our country today. At 175 (Pride), he could be seen as an embarrassment or lacking the self-respect to better himself. At 200 (Courage), we might be motivated to wonder if there is a local homeless shelter – all he needs is a job and a place to live.
  • At 250 (Neutrality), the bum looks okay, maybe even interesting. “Live and let live,” we might say – after all, he’s not hurting anyone. At 310 (Willingness), we might decide to go down and see what we can do to cheer up that fellow on the corner; maybe we’d be motivated to volunteer some time at the local shelter. At 350 (Acceptance), the man on the corner appears intriguing: He probably has an interesting story to tell; he’s where he is for reasons we may never understand. At 400 (Reason), he’s a symptom of the current economic and social malaise, or perhaps a good subject for in-depth psychological study.
  • At the higher levels, the old man begins to look not only interesting, but friendly – and then lovable. Perhaps we’d then be able to see that he is, in fact, one who had transcended social limits and gone free, a joyful old guy with the wisdom of age in his face and the serenity that comes from indifference to material things. At 600 (Peace), he’s revealed as our own self in a temporary expression. 

When approached, the bum’s response to these different levels of consciousness would vary with them. With some, he’d feel secure – with others, frightened or dejected. Some would make him angry; others would delight him; some he’d avoid, others he’d greet with pleasure. (And so it’s said that we meet what we mirror.)

So much for the manner in which our level of consciousness – that is; the world we encounter as passive observers – decides what we see. It’s true that we’ll react to things in a fashion predicated by the level that we perceive them from, that is to say, external events may define conditions, but they don’t determine the consciousness level of human response…”

Your Life – Your Choice – Your Consciousness

So what did you first see when you set eyes upon this homeless man?

After reading the above passage, where do you fall on the scale of consciousness?

Are you surprised to know that there are many ways to perceive the same thing?

Can you see now that it is the quality of our consciousness that determines our reality?

What we believe, we percieve.

Self-Inquiry and The Spiritual Journey

We all have beliefs, but the challenge is that many of these are unconscious. When we are called to walk the spiritual path we are being called to question our thoughts, beliefs, and emotions. Self-inquiry is the conscious act of questioning oneself and reflecting on whether a particular belief or thought is true.

Examining our thoughts helps us to recognize where we are holding ourselves back in life, where we are limiting ourselves, and where we are not taking responsiblity.

The awakening process is about coming to the truth of who and what we are. We must examine our thoughts and beliefs in order to evolve beyond certain attitudes, states of mind, and perceptions.

Having a spiritual teacher, mentor, and coach can facilitate this process of self-inquiry by asking you the tough questions, helping you face your shadow self, and support you in the integration process.

If you are interested in learning more about Spiritual Coaching and Mentoring please schedule your discovery call today. I look forward to meeting you! 

Are You Ready to See Yourself Clearly?

How To Stop Caring About What Others Think of You

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Do you worry about what others think of you or what they might say behind your back?

If you do, then you are not alone. Nearly everyone has worried about what someone will think of them at some time or another in their life.

The fear of being judged is a common fear; nearly everyone suffers from it. But there is a way to get beyond this fear and to rise above it.

There is a way for us to understand where this fear of being judged comes from and what we can do to set ourselves free.

The good news is, you don’t have to suffer from this and there is a permanent way out! 

What Hidden Patterns Are Shaping Your Reality?

The Virtue of Paying Attention

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I recently attended a local bike coalition charity dinner and auction for the third year in a row as my husband is an avid cyclist. As we made our way to our table, I recognized two familiar faces. I smiled and reached out my hand to say hello but before I could the woman said to me, “Hello, nice to meet you. You must be new. I’m Virginia.” I was amused as I said, “We’ve met twice before. I’m Liz, I was here last year and the year before.” The woman looked genuinely confused but smiled politely and then hurriedly looked down into her phone to gauge where she was at in the online bidding war for her new bike bench.

As the night continued, I enjoyed small talk with the couple and asked about their previous year’s winnings, she, a light reflector jacket for cycling and him a new helmet. They both were surprised yet touched that I remembered such small details.

This experience happens quite frequently where I remember faces seen just once or recall a conversation nearly word for word. People tend to think that I have some amazing memory but in fact I simply pay attention. Wherever I am or find myself to be, I give total uncompromising attention to my present experience. This is not something that I consciously aim to do. This is a natural consequence and result of many years of meditation and subsequent slowing down of internal thoughts in order to allow the present moment to shine through.

Why Paying Attention Matters – Effortless Grace and Ease

Our bodies and minds are tools that we use to navigate this reality. Many people are so deeply identified with their bodies and minds that their awareness and attention is solely focused on these two dimensions exclusively. If all your energy is focused on your body (five senses including: sight, smell, hearing, taste, and touch) or your mind (random thoughts, excited emotions, past memories and future projections) then that leaves very little energy to actually pay attention and be aware of your world.

Increasing your available energy to pay 100% attention to your present experience is what mindfulness, or a sustained meditation practice is all about. Spiritual or conscious evolution is essentially increasing your capacity and capability to be fully aware and attentive to your present surroundings.

One may wonder why paying attention is such a valuable commodity. The reason is because, if you offer uncompromising awareness and attention to your present experience you will navigate life without unnecessary negative consequences, pitfalls, or limitations.

A fully conscious person is not immune to negative circumstances or events, but their higher perceptions and increased clarity allow them more options to seek a solution to whatever challenge is currently presented to them. People that are heavily influenced by their body senses and/or internal thoughts do not have enough energy to clear the space for more options. Options come from clarity of mind and one can act far more efficiently, effortlessly and intelligently than those who struggle to see the forest from the trees.

Some years ago, when my grandmother was still alive, I received a frantic phone call from my aunt telling me that my grandmother was diagnosed with early stage breast cancer. At the time my grandmother was 92 years old. I was sad to hear this, but I knew that my grandmother wouldn’t live forever and that her body was starting to break down and cancer had overtaken her normally healthy immune system. To my surprise my aunt then told me that my grandmother’s doctor recommended a mastectomy as soon as possible in order to stop the cancer from spreading. As I listened, I heard many thoughts pop up into my mindscape; ‘She is too old for such an invasive procedure’, ‘this sounds like an over the top and drastic solution’, ‘there must be another way to go about treating this’. I calmly described each of these ideas to my aunt, but she was overcome with emotion and almost desperate to get the appointment scheduled for my grandmother to go have her mastectomy immediately.

My aunt even went so far as to describe in vivid detail a nonexistent wound that would swell and fester and create much unnecessary pain for my grandmother. My aunt was very much sold on the idea of the emergency mastectomy and was defending her position by trying to convince me that this was the right direction to take. Yet, I remained calm and steady as I listened to her words. When I realized that my aunt wouldn’t listen to any other alternative, I simply said, “at least get another opinion from a highly credited geriatric oncologist to see what other options we have.” The phone went silent and my aunt had nothing to say. It never occurred to her to seek a 2nd opinion much less discover an alternative treatment.

A week later my aunt called me again to tell me that they went to see another oncologist at Loyola Hospital, and she prescribed noninvasive hormone therapy in order to shrink the small tumor. Both my grandmother and aunt elected for this option and things soon settled back to normal.

How to Develop A Clear Mind

We live in a physical universe governed by physical laws. Our bodies require food for energy and sleep for rejuvenation and repair. Money is the currency we use to live in a house, buy food, purchase clothes, and drive a car. We earn a living in various ways depending on capability, experience, and or intellect.

Developing a clear mind is no different from losing weight or earning a master’s degree. One needs to do the prescribed actions on a consistent basis in order to actualize results. The only question is, are you dedicated, disciplined, and motivated enough to put forth the necessary effort to live more consciously?

We don’t have to worry about beating our heart to pump our blood to our various organs, muscles and brain. Life and existence have taken this burden from us. Likewise, we don’t manage our breathing or think about consciously filling our lungs with enough oxygen in order to keep us alive. This happens for us and is a gift from existence to not be burdened with this internal process. Everything happens for us so we may free up our minds to explore creation as we see fit. Thus, it goes as no surprise that the most ancient and simple method for developing a clear mind is to watch our breath.

Watching our breath can be done anytime anywhere and it is done exactly as described. Watch. Your. Breath. It is that simple. We are not deep breathing; we are not managing the process. We are simply being aware of our breath. Being aware of this consistent process regularly trains the mind to be in the present moment. If we are in the present moment we are not thinking of the past or remembering a previous event or experience, we are not imagining a potential future, we are not participating in a nonexistent conversation with someone in our heads, we are not worrying, we are not debating, we are not fantasizing, we are not day dreaming. We are simply watching our breath.

At first one may perform this exercise sitting with eyes closed. This will lead one through the classic stages of Dharana and Dhyana (concentration and classic meditation) and perhaps Samadhi (various levels of bliss attainment beyond mind/body awareness). When you feel comfortable doing this exercise sitting down you can graduate to watching your breath as you go about your daily routine. To many this suggestion sounds impossible, but trust me, with enough practice this becomes a natural state of consciousness.

The Natural Excitement and Wonder Of Existence  

When you go about your day being aware of your breath you are in the present moment and seeing only what the present moment and experience brings to you. Thus, your level of awareness increases and your attention to detail grows.

You notice things you weren’t aware of before, the smell of flowers, the way the sunlight dances across the sidewalk, the gentle breeze through your hair and across your face. You hear a child laughing or a bird singing. You notice the insect crossing your path or see the wise old man watching you on the bench. You notice the woman talking fast because she’s nervous and needs assurance or the executive on the phone to a customer and sense he is telling a fib to get an unfair advantage. You notice the runner coming towards you and you can see, sense, feel and know their exuberance of being alive in a body that is strong, capable and free.

Life is full of excitement without looking for it. We just need to be attentive and the only way we can do this is to cultivate a mind that is clear, calm, and ready to work at our command – not the other way around.

If you would like to learn more about awareness, consciousness, meditation, or clarity please contact me for a free 30-minute discovery session where we can discuss your needs and what you’d like to bring more of into your life. I look forward to speaking with you!

What’s Beneath the Surface of Your Conscious Awareness?

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Elizabeth Hancock CPC, CSC - Yogi, Mystic, Artist

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